Long tail pro is quite good, its keyword competition module can save a lot of time
Sure getting 100% follow links and see how it goes
Are your content unique? if they are then it sounds like you are under over optimization penalty.
It is a factor, but just a small one, plus server location does affect loading time anyway
Try serpbook or serpfox. They are pretty accurate Serpfox allows you to track 10 keywords for free
You could try Text Broker also, pricier but the quality seems better
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